Archive for the ‘Leadership’ Category

WAIT – Why Am I Talking?

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

I recently did a half-day communications workshop for the National Association of Women Business Owners (NAWBO) Greater Detroit Chapter.   When I asked the question, what value did you get out of today – WAIT was high on the list.

WAIT stands for “Why Am I Talking?”  It’s a reminder to, basically, shut up and listen.  Really listen.

We all have a tendency to be thinking of what we’re going to say next when the other person is talking, instead of trying to understand their point of view and their concerns.  It’s easy to understand how this can get you into trouble.

The really bad part is not only do we do that to other people, we do it to ourselves.  We don’t shut up long enough to really hear what’s going on inside our minds.  We’re thinking instead of all the things we have to do, all the things that could go wrong, what’s for dinner, what’s going on this weekend, etc. etc..

What we really all need to do is take some time on a regular basis and WAIT.  Shut up and listen to what’s really important with ourselves.   We need to really understand where we’re coming from and our own point of view. We owe as much courtesy to ourselves as we owe to others.   And in order to be able to really listen to others, we need to be able to listen to ourselves.

Practice this for a week or two, and you will be really surprised at what you may find out.  Dreams that you had all but forgotten.  Things that you thought were important really aren’t, and visa versa.  You may have been drowning out your hopes and desires for a long time.

So, this week – WAIT and let me know what you hear.

Easy One Page Business Plan

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

Here’s a quick and easy one page business plan format that you can use to set or update your company direction, focus and goals for 2010.  This is a great plan for small companies who don’t typically have time or money to do detailed planning.  It also works well for individual career planning.

Mission:

What is your purpose?  Why are you in business?  Why do you do what you do?  2 – 3 Sentences

Vision:

How does your purpose translate into concrete terms?  Paint a picture.   2 – 3 Sentences.

Objectives:

What by when?  What do you need to do this year to move your vision forward?

Strategies:

What overall approaches will you take to reach your objectives this year?

Plans:

The actual steps that you will take to reach your objectives.  Note that these may often be project that require plans in and of themselves.

Go ahead, schedule an hour and see what you come up with.   Keep refining your business plan until it meets your needs.  Then prepare to update it quarterly.  Business plans are useless unless they are looked at and measured.

Post what you come up with, and see what others have done.  If you get stuck, call me.  I am offering  a free coaching session to everyone for January.

Next week we’ll talk about how to measure performance against your plans.

Time Management, Part 2

Monday, December 14th, 2009

Since we’re now in the silly season, it seems very appropriate that I focus on the one thing that seems to be a major challenge in the holiday season – time management.  I mentioned some basics in the last post.  In this post, I want to really emphasize what’s important.  As in knowing what’s important to you is absolutely critical to managing your time.

Have you noticed when you or someone you know is dealing with a crisis, major illness or emergency – things seem to get done quickly and with amazing clarity.  All of a sudden, time is an absolutely precious commodity and it must be spent on only the most important and critical of things.  It becomes very easy to prioritize your time at that point because the consequences are dire and immediate.

It’s when we lose that sense of urgency and go back to the everyday that we start being unable to manage our time and priorities get lost or  mixed up in the moment.

What if you could manage your time as if you were critically ill or in crisis without the crisis?   What would be different if you were aware of how valuable your time was every moment and spent it accordingly?  Would you work out every day?  Eat right?  Not watch so much TV?

We all tend to get lost in the moment at work, at home or when managing our businesses.   If you can keep what’s really important to you present at all times, you will be able to gain a great deal of productivity and effectiveness – not to mention seriously lowering your stress level.

Your assignment this week is to really lay out the top 5 (no more) most important things in your business and life in writing.  Evaluate every hour you spend your time based on that list – and see how it goes.

Well-Being – Your Capacity to Produce

Saturday, May 16th, 2009

I had a very pointed reminder this week of how vital it is to take care of yourself physically, emotionally, spiritually and intellectually. I’ve been running full-tilt, not paying attention to my needs for a while now.  This is something pretty common with a lot of people.  We often take better care of our cars than ourselves.

I, like a lot of people, equate more with better when it comes to work. For example, if your business isn’t producing the results you want, then do more. I know better. I have years of experience insisting on solving the problem instead of throwing money or people at it. And yet I still fell into the same old trap. It’s an easy thing to do, especially being Type A and working for myself. And the predictable happened. I woke up Friday morning with a nasty case of laryngitis.

For most folks this wouldn’t be the end of the world, but for me, everything stops dead. Without my voice, I can’t make a living.  I had to cancel a speaking engagement and several other things.  NOT good.

Stephen Covey refers to this as the “P/PC Balance.”  In a nutshell, it’s the balance of what you produce and your capacity to produce.  It is the very definition of effectiveness.  I literally killed the goose that produced the golden egg,  my voice.  For me, another example is the shoemaker’s children.  Well-being, the capacity to produce, is the one of the major things I watch for with my clients and yet completely neglected in myself.

My first priority now is to restore that balance by eating right, exercising and taking time off for myself.   I was lucky,  it wasn’t anything really serious or debilitating.  Just a minor warning.

How about you?  Are you taking care of your well-being?  Or are you ignoring the signs that you need to take better care of yourself?

The Golden Rule of Communicating

Monday, April 13th, 2009

Every time we talk to someone, we are training them how to talk to us.  It goes back to the Golden Rule – Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.   Think of this as the Golden Rule of Communications.  – Communicate to others what your expectations are.

Think of all the people you’ve talked to over the past few weeks.  What have they communicated to you.  Look for the underlying message whenever you talk to someone – what are the tone of their voice, their facial expressions, body language and speech patterns telling you?  Usually the words are the least important part of the message.

Now pay attention to your own communications.  If you were a complete stranger, how would you receive the messages you’re sending?  Even better ask 5 people this week  what their experience is of you.

Does it match the experience you want them to have?  Are your words consistent with your body language and tone?  It isn’t very effective to ask for a sale when your tone of voice says don’t buy from me, I’m a lousy salesperson.  It’s time to take responsibility for the message you send people.

How can you be more effective at communicating your intentions this week?

Commitments – An exercise

Wednesday, April 8th, 2009

Here’s a good exercise to help you focus on aligning your life with your goals and aspirations.

  1. List your top 5 commitments in life.  An example would be 1 – self-care, 2 – spouse, 3 – work, 4 – family, 5 – friends.
  2. Now track where you spend your time for a full week?
  3. Does your time reflect your commitments?  If someone else looked at how you spend your time, what would they say you were committed to?

For most of us it won’t.  For example when I look at actual time spent over the last week, it would look like I was committed to eating lots of carbohydrates, or being exhausted and fussy.

Now here’s the big step – 4.  What actions will you take on in the next week to align your life with your commitments?

Respond here and let us know.

I won’t be eating bread for the next week.  Pretty cool that it’s Passover anyway.

Justice

Wednesday, March 25th, 2009

“An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind”   – Mahatma Gandhi

This is one of my favorite quotes.  It really speaks to the trap that most of the world seems to be in today.  They do it to you, so you do it back.  It’s very easy to understand the emotions involved.  If someone killed or hurt my family, I’d want to hurt them back – hard.  And I’d want to do it personally.  It might give me  justice and short-term satisfaction, but it certainly would not lead anywhere but down.  It wouldn’t bring back my family, restore the pain in my soul or heal my grief.

And on a much less political scale, this quote speaks to the the pendulum swing the economy is in.  Many, many people made millions in the booms of the last 20 years, and many millions of people are now suffering as a result of that.  Punishing a few individuals won’t fix the holes in the regulatory system that allowed it to happen, nor will it restore jobs or homes to the people that have lost them.

Looking forward and asking what do we want are much more likely to produce results and healing  than justice.   We set high store by justice and fairness, but all they do is make sure everyone suffers.  Ask yourself what you really want to create the next time you want to give someone what they have coming.  Evaluate the people you elect on the basis of what they will create, not what they are against.   The more we stop worrying about concepts like fairness and justice, the better the world will be.  Justice can only destroy, not build.

It isn’t easy to set that anger aside and think about the future,  but it’s in your best interest and everyone else’s too.  Asking yourself  “What is my intention here?” or “What do I want to create?”  produces results.  In a business situation, asking what you want instead of what is fair is far more effective.

So what do you want to create?

Stuck

Monday, March 2nd, 2009

Do you feel unappreciated or unrecognized for the job you do?  Do you have more responsibility without the title and compensation to go with it?  Do you feel like there’s no communication at your company?    Feel like you’re at a dead-end?  And things are not going to get any better at the company you’re at, but you’re afraid of ending up in exactly the same situation if you change jobs?  Are you really frustrated, stressed out and angry?  And no one can help you?

If you feel this way, you’re probably right.  No one can help you.  You built the box you’re in, and only you can get yourself out of it.  The only way out is to realize that the box isn’t really there.   You created it the minute you started looking for something to blame and being right was more important than anything else.

The great news is that there is a way out – and there is help.  The minute you accept responsibility for creating your experience, the box will disappear.  You will see that you have options and choices about what you do and lots of people to available to support you in whatever you choose.   Your options may be developing the skills you need to thrive in the new environment, evaluating the situation against your values and priorities and choosing something different,  just being happy and unstressed by the situation -  and so on.  The options are endless once you choose to be responsible for your experience.  You have reclaimed your power and are now unstuck.

Choose to be responsible!

The Power of Responsibility

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

I talked with 2 women on the same day last week.  They were in very similar situations.  Both owned their own businesses in very similar fields.  Both were in their 50’s.  Both women enjoyed what they did.  But there the similarity ended.

One woman had, despite suffering an extremely debilitating injury,  an air of joy and peace about her that was almost palpable.  She loved what she did and it showed.  It was a joy to talk and be with her.  And it was clear that this was the experience for her staff as well.  She had loyal employees who acted as her hands when she couldn’t do something.  They had been with her a while.  They clearly enjoyed working in her business.  Business was good, even in this economy.

The second woman was clearly resentful, unhappy and unpleasant to be around.   She spent most of the time complaining and the word I heard most often was “should.”  “I shouldn’t have to tell her that.”  She didn’t feel comfortable delegating to anyone and consequently was overloaded.    Her business, despite having a good base, was not anywhere near thriving.  She also wasn’t doing the things she needed to do to grow the business.  Staff turnover was one of her biggest issues.

The main difference between the two:  Responsibility!   The first woman clearly took responsibility for her choices and saw the possibilities.  She  did not let circumstances stop her.   She just adjusted how she worked.   The second saw herself as  a victim of her business and her staff instead of empowering herself.   She let her circumstances control her decisions and consequently couldn’t get ahead.  She let herself become a victim to her fear.

Which one would you rather be?  The choice is yours.